Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
