If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
