I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
