wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
