I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
