My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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