Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
