porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
