I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
