I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
