Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
bring money and cleavage
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
