About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
