you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
