umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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