I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
