I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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