Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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