even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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