Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
So much Jack, so little girl.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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