So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I have post one night stand depression
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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