I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
