You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
