Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
