is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
