Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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