hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You pole danced in your parka.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize