There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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