I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Randomize
