I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
