im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize