A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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