The brown eye won't let me do that either.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
