I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
