I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
