Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
