i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
