I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
