He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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