think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
