So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Enjoy the penises
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
