I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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