they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
