Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
