How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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