i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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