There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
