I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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