She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
