well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
