One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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